Saturday, 24 August 2013

Here again

So there it is again,
Sitting on my partners couch as he answers the drunk phone to a screaming girl.
My existence goes unmentioned and I try to pretend it does not concern me as I sit salient on the couch.

This feeling,
I've always wondered if this feeling makes my heart race faster or slower.
Either way I feel horrid.
I sink the rest of my wine still hearing the murmurs of conversation from a room I have escaped.

Moment like this make us think.
Is this fear a result of something we should truly be concerned about or is it learnt from all the past exs who taught us we couldn't trust.

I watch a scene unfolds parallel to that I've experienced before. I feel sick, horrified, disgusted. I want to run, hide, leave, escape.

What am I doing here?

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